10 Reasons Why I Should Keep My Mouth Shut

1. I usually have nothing good to say.
   
   
2. The things I do say hurt people's feelings. Sarcasm doesn't work well with everyone.
   
   
3. When I attempt to sound smart, I usually fail miserably.
   
   
4. I usually don't know what I'm talking about.
   
   
5. A conversation should start at the worst time ever for me. I don't do this on purpose.
   
   
6. When it's time to be a chatterbox, I'm very quiet. This makes me look like an asshole. I usually say the worst things to say at the worst time after being quiet for so long. Which makes me think that being an asshole is actually better than trying to redeem myself.
   
   
7. I try to be funny everytime and everytime, it reminds me I'm not. But I forget this fact almost instantly.
   
   
8. I am very negative.
   
   
9. I am positive when it's a lose lose situation.
   
   
10. I am excruciatingly boring. So keeping my mouth shut will help to set the illusion that I'm a normal person.